I spent my pre-kindergarten to high school years in a fairly conservative Christian school. The Bible was seen as the ultimate authority, but as students we were always encouraged to ask questions. We debated about abortion, the inerrancy of Scripture, and whether or not one could lose salvation. I tended to take the more heretical side during these discussions, whether I agreed with them or not, because I wanted to ask questions and not just make ignorant assumptions. But I never questioned the existence of God.
To me, it has always been impossible to doubt Him. There are many reasons for this, I'm sure. People often can't let themselves believe in Him because they have had such horrible life experiences; I had a very privileged childhood in a wonderful family, with no overwhelming sense of abandonment. Others argue that they want to believe in God, but that their knowledge about the universe simply cannot mesh with the absurdity of the Bible and Christianity.
That second reason is the argument that is becoming more challenging for me. I never really thought about Evolution or the Big Bang Theory growing up, even as I debated and questioned every other topic imaginable. For some reason, I always considered the conventional theory of Creationism to be a given. As I got older, I allowed that perhaps God could have used these two processes, but that He was still the mastermind behind it all. With this I had no problem.
But the more I grow familiar with some atheistic theories, the more doubts I find rising inside of me. Perhaps the Biblical retorts I learned in high school are much more ignorant than I thought; maybe these theories actually possess a great deal of validity.
I always thought that, because our universe could only survive under such ideal conditions, then obviously God created it this way. But then I hear new (to me) theories, such as this: millions upon billions of reactions had been taking place constantly, and eventually one of these reactions resulted in our solar system. As a Christian, I would argue that the odds of our world developing by mere chance are infinitely small. But then again, if there were millions of reactions, it is not unreasonable to believe that one could have worked out perfectly to support our world.
Of course this theory has flaws, particularly how that original matter or energy came into existence. I believe that, given enough sample space, something incredibly improbable could happen, but I do not believe that something impossible could ever happen, no matter how much time was given.
Atheists sometimes state the philosophical idea that, of course everything is "just right" for our existence here; if the sun were just a little bit closer to us, we wouldn't be alive in the first place. I can kind of see truth to this idea. It seems like our world was carefully designed especially for us, but that's only because if the situation wasn't ideal, then we wouldn't be around to debate this topic anyways.
My main frustration with this whole debate on the origin of the universe is that I am ultimately clueless. Like a Medieval peasant with no Bible in the vernacular, I am forced to trust more knowledgeable people who are able to read. In this case, I must rely on physicists because I do not understand it on my own. Talk of molecular motion and subatomic particles leaves me confused, never mind the complications that come into play when debating eternity. So, I am forced to rely on what scientists tell me. I have no way of knowing what is true, or what is even logical, which puts me in a very lowly and dangerous position.
But although my lack of scientific aptitude leaves me feeling somewhat helpless, certain concepts still keep me from turning my back on the Creator. Theists often speak of the complexity of the human organism, or the unique patterns of individual snowflakes, and while those are certainly strong evidence for an intelligent design, they are not the strongest evidence for my belief in God. To me, the concept of human consciousness is impossible to fathom without belief in God. Perhaps the intricacies of the brain could develop given enough time, but the human mind could not. Our ability to reason cannot be explained, nor our inherent ability to distinguish right from wrong. I do not believe that such an abstract development could happen by chance.
Linguists often use the term "Universal Grammar" for the theory that all people are born with an innate ability to learn language. This idea is nearly universally accepted, by both theists and atheists alike. Most people may not see this as evidence for God, but I do. According to the theory, all babies are born with a language blueprint. They have the ability to understand linguistic concepts of all languages, not just ones they hear at home, and are able to make sounds from every dialect, even ones that are never spoken where they live. There is overwhelming support (which I can't go into in much detail here) for the belief that babies do not learn language from their parents or "Baby Einstein" videos, but that they are born with an innate capacity to speak. To me, this is great evidence for intelligent design; such a uniquely complex development does not just merely happen.
So, I believe in God. Maybe most of my reasons for belief are not purely logical and cannot be explained through mathematical formulas or scientific postulates. But I do believe that there is scientific evidence for a Creator. Maybe He used Evolution, maybe He used the Big Bang-- I don't know, but I see no problem with that. But no matter how much time elapses, I don't believe that the complexity of the world could be the mere result of chemical reactions. I understand that there is some great support for those theories, but I do not think they adequately explain the complexity of our human intellect, emotions, and innate knowledge of language and morality.
Perhaps logic alone cannot prove the existence of God. But logic alone certainly does not disprove His existence either.
(October 18, 2010)
To me, it has always been impossible to doubt Him. There are many reasons for this, I'm sure. People often can't let themselves believe in Him because they have had such horrible life experiences; I had a very privileged childhood in a wonderful family, with no overwhelming sense of abandonment. Others argue that they want to believe in God, but that their knowledge about the universe simply cannot mesh with the absurdity of the Bible and Christianity.
That second reason is the argument that is becoming more challenging for me. I never really thought about Evolution or the Big Bang Theory growing up, even as I debated and questioned every other topic imaginable. For some reason, I always considered the conventional theory of Creationism to be a given. As I got older, I allowed that perhaps God could have used these two processes, but that He was still the mastermind behind it all. With this I had no problem.
But the more I grow familiar with some atheistic theories, the more doubts I find rising inside of me. Perhaps the Biblical retorts I learned in high school are much more ignorant than I thought; maybe these theories actually possess a great deal of validity.
I always thought that, because our universe could only survive under such ideal conditions, then obviously God created it this way. But then I hear new (to me) theories, such as this: millions upon billions of reactions had been taking place constantly, and eventually one of these reactions resulted in our solar system. As a Christian, I would argue that the odds of our world developing by mere chance are infinitely small. But then again, if there were millions of reactions, it is not unreasonable to believe that one could have worked out perfectly to support our world.
Of course this theory has flaws, particularly how that original matter or energy came into existence. I believe that, given enough sample space, something incredibly improbable could happen, but I do not believe that something impossible could ever happen, no matter how much time was given.
Atheists sometimes state the philosophical idea that, of course everything is "just right" for our existence here; if the sun were just a little bit closer to us, we wouldn't be alive in the first place. I can kind of see truth to this idea. It seems like our world was carefully designed especially for us, but that's only because if the situation wasn't ideal, then we wouldn't be around to debate this topic anyways.
My main frustration with this whole debate on the origin of the universe is that I am ultimately clueless. Like a Medieval peasant with no Bible in the vernacular, I am forced to trust more knowledgeable people who are able to read. In this case, I must rely on physicists because I do not understand it on my own. Talk of molecular motion and subatomic particles leaves me confused, never mind the complications that come into play when debating eternity. So, I am forced to rely on what scientists tell me. I have no way of knowing what is true, or what is even logical, which puts me in a very lowly and dangerous position.
But although my lack of scientific aptitude leaves me feeling somewhat helpless, certain concepts still keep me from turning my back on the Creator. Theists often speak of the complexity of the human organism, or the unique patterns of individual snowflakes, and while those are certainly strong evidence for an intelligent design, they are not the strongest evidence for my belief in God. To me, the concept of human consciousness is impossible to fathom without belief in God. Perhaps the intricacies of the brain could develop given enough time, but the human mind could not. Our ability to reason cannot be explained, nor our inherent ability to distinguish right from wrong. I do not believe that such an abstract development could happen by chance.
Linguists often use the term "Universal Grammar" for the theory that all people are born with an innate ability to learn language. This idea is nearly universally accepted, by both theists and atheists alike. Most people may not see this as evidence for God, but I do. According to the theory, all babies are born with a language blueprint. They have the ability to understand linguistic concepts of all languages, not just ones they hear at home, and are able to make sounds from every dialect, even ones that are never spoken where they live. There is overwhelming support (which I can't go into in much detail here) for the belief that babies do not learn language from their parents or "Baby Einstein" videos, but that they are born with an innate capacity to speak. To me, this is great evidence for intelligent design; such a uniquely complex development does not just merely happen.
So, I believe in God. Maybe most of my reasons for belief are not purely logical and cannot be explained through mathematical formulas or scientific postulates. But I do believe that there is scientific evidence for a Creator. Maybe He used Evolution, maybe He used the Big Bang-- I don't know, but I see no problem with that. But no matter how much time elapses, I don't believe that the complexity of the world could be the mere result of chemical reactions. I understand that there is some great support for those theories, but I do not think they adequately explain the complexity of our human intellect, emotions, and innate knowledge of language and morality.
Perhaps logic alone cannot prove the existence of God. But logic alone certainly does not disprove His existence either.
(October 18, 2010)
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